Examine where you have been, where you are and where you are going

Now that you have reflected, it is time to dig deeper and examine your life. You may be asking, what is the difference between reflecting and examining? Reflecting gave you the opportunity to consider your life. Examining goes deeper and ask the tougher questions; The What, Why, When and How.


Examining your life is not something you will want to rush through. Make sure you schedule plenty of quiet time. Create an environment that will bring you peace and comfort. This process of bringing up memories can be painful. Keep on hand a box of tissues and a soothing cup of tea, coffee or hot chocolate. You may even need to have a friend, relative or therapist available in case it gets to be overwhelming. Your support system should be trustworthy and compassionate. They should offer an ear not advice. This is your time to explore your feelings on who you are, your thoughts and your actions. Let your feelings flow. Do not suppress them. They are clues to your past, present and the future.


In your notebook label the top of the page with the different areas of your life. For example: Personal growth, Health, Relationships, Spiritual, Financial, Work, Recreation, just to name a few. Using the notes you made during your reflection, examine your photos, scrapbooks, journals/dairies and mementos and ask yourself the following and record your answers under each heading that applies.

  • Who am I? That may not be a very easy question to answer after you have been through a loss. Look at you photos of yourself. What age are you in the photo? What are you doing? Did you enjoy it? What emotions come up as you are looking at the photo? Is anyone with you? Who? How do you feel about that person or persons? What did you like/dislike about yourself? What were your hopes and dreams?
  •  What are your accomplishments? Are they personal or professional accomplishments? Did they bring you joy? Why or why not? Why did you accomplish what you did? Was it for you or someone else? Who did you accomplish it for and why?
  • What are my gifts and talents? Are you using your gifts and talents in your life? When? To what degree? What areas of your life do you use them?
  • What is your motivation for doing what you do? Is it for you or to please someone else? Does it bring you joy? Do you enjoy your job or does it just pay the bills without any satisfaction?
  • Who do you spend the most time with? How do they add value to your life? How do they drain your energy? Why do you spend time with them?

Finally, take a look at each category and ask:  What is working? What is not working? Why or why not? What theme or common thread are you discovering? What are you tolerating in your life? What excites you and gives your life meaning? How can you incorporate more of the things that excite and bring meaning to you into your life?

Examining your life will help you discover where you have been, where you are and where you want to go. Take plenty of time for this exercise. Your growth and progress are worth the effort.

I would love to hear from you. Let me know if this content is helpful or just say hello. I look forward to reading your comments.

Remember that you are not alone, I am here to walk along side of you.


Interested in coaching services? Follow this link for more details:  Coaching Packages




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